I'm a dirty old man
I do what I can
Tryin' to make a livin'
I'm a dirty old man

I like to get hammered
On Friday night
Sometimes I can't wait
So Monday's alright

It's a battle with the bottle
I'll win it alright
But I lost another round
In the bar last night

I'm a dirty old man
I do what I can
Tryin' to make a livin'
I'm a dirty old man

Yeah, I'm gonna get fired
For drinkin' on the job
Got caught with the boss's wife
In the parking lot

I'm gonna get killed
For doin' this again
But I just can't help it
It's under my skin

I'm a dirty old man
I do what I can
I'm gonna get hammered
And do it again

I'm a dirty old man
I do what I can
Tryin' to make a livin'
I'm a dirty old man

Got a bag of frozen peas
I use on my knees
I injured from beggin'
And tryin' to please

If you believe that
I'm losing my fat
Got a workout program
And a new rubber mat

I'm a dirty old man
I do what I can
Tryin' to make a livin'
I'm a dirty old man

I'm a dirty old man