Shopping spree for the family tree,
Haven't seen your family tree in quite a while,
Too many sandwiches and wine,
Sherry stains down your best mans tie, what a speech,

The band arrives, the granny's cry,
The singer's tongues in the barmaids mouth what a voice,
Grandpa drank a drop or two,
And his heads still sunk in the portaloo, what a man

You bought a sequin dress for your chicken breast,
The disco's late and he's overpaid tonight,
You got a diamond ring and a man who sings,
The man who sings made love to the barmaid twice,
And that's just tonight

The blue rinsed hairs, lift up their chairs,
The band's too loud, they're off downstairs,
What a noise,
The bride and groom dance, they dance that dance,
And the singer mimes, there's still a chance,
The barmaid smiles

You bought a sequin dress for your chicken breast,
The disco's late and he's overpaid tonight,
You got a diamond ring and a man who sings,
The man who sings made love to the barmaid twice,
And that's just tonight

Ha na na, ha na na
Ha na na,
Ha na na, ha na na

You bought a sequin dress for your chicken breast,
The disco's late and he's overpaid tonight,
You got a diamond ring and a man who sings,
The man who sings made love to the barmaid twice,
Ha, Grandpa drank a drop or two,
His heads still sunk in the portaloo again,
The bride and groom dance, they dance that dance,
And the singer mimes, there's still a chance, tonight,
And the barmaid smiles