Well we sat on the bank and I was pissed
When I saw him pushing to play with your garden
She said have you got a match? and I said yes!
My cock and farmer giles prize winning marrows!

Listen, Fuck off! gonna call the cops, we’re not married
Fly on the heels on fields of wheat
Felt the heat, would you like me?

I carved “You for me” in the bark of a tree in an English Country Garden
Larked around, pissing on the ground in an English Country Garden
We both took a chance as you sank into my arms in an English Country Garden
Beneath the stars above we fell in love in a English Country Garden

Sha na sha na sha na na na

Took the quiz at the village fete, we came last
Everybody laughed at the two of us
Never seen a biro pen, move so fast
She was a bonefide fucking genius
You’re the one that always feels for me
On the trampoline, you tumbled into me

When they all found out, we were rocking out in an English Country Garden
You ruled the roost and gave my heart a boost in an English Country Garden
Took me under your wing when we had our fling in an English Country Garden!
I felt fruity and you got booty in an English Country Garden'

(SOLO and lengthy "KeyTar" medley section)

Pulling all the stops I was in the crops in an English Country Garden
A ground force ringer, you were bored and single in an English Country Garden
Seeds we scattered, never really mattered in a English Country Garden
We had a day of fun where it all goes on in a English Country Garden


[Another version of this song:]

It was a cigarette break, and i was desperate
When I saw him pushing that wheelbarrow
She said have you got a match? and I said yes!
My cock and farmer giles's prize winning marrow!

Frollicking in the sun and fields of wheat
I fell for you, when you used to like me

I carved “You for me” in the bark of a tree in an English Country Garden
We rolled around, pissing on the ground in an English Country Garden
You succumbed to my charms fell asleep in my arms in an English Country Garden
Beneath the stars above we fell in love in a English Country Garden

Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up!

Took the quiz at the village fete, we came last
Everybody laughed at the two of us
Never seen a bail of hay, move so fast
She was a bonefide fucking genius
Frollicking in the awesome fields of wheat
I cherished you, with the torporific me

We mocked a babble we were marking out in an English Country Garden
You took me under your wing when we had our fling in an English Country Garden
You gave my heart a boost, we ruled the roost in an english country garden
Just as I got fruity, you got moody in an English Country Garden!

(Bad boy guitar solo and lengthy "KeyTar" medley section)

Pulling all the stops I westered the crops in an English Country Garden
The yeild was minging,your a farlie singer in an English Country Garden
Seeds we scattered, never really mattered in a English Country Garden
I saw the new pack farm on another guys arm, in a English Country Garden!!
Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, wooo!

(thanks to baillie for this version)